A Separate Peace
by Azure K Mello
Summary: COMPLETE What if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled? Kinda sorta losely almost based on the book of same night. SA SLASH
1. Default Chapter

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Dedicated to- Dr. G for making me laugh the other day by calling me "Fucked up and crazy. . . ya know, Az, normal people don't do these things." To which I replied with fake astonishment "OMG! Really? 'cause here I thought I paid you two hundred bucks an hour because I was normal and didn't need physiological help." He laughed and apologized.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
He never told anyone how he found him. It had been more than he could bear. It had been like seeing his God on the gallows. It had been like seeing Mickey Mouse smoking. Or the first time a child realizes their parents are druggies, or that they fall, or swear. He had come home from a night of feasting with his princess to find his God crying pathetic in a corner. The sobbing mass just stared at him, he saw a trace of his Lord in this wretches eyes.  
  
"Angelus?" Spike ask slowly approaching the man. "What is the matter? What's happened?" he asked on the verge of hysterics. If Angelus his maker, the man who had broken, and loved, and taught him could be hurt it would surly trickle down to hurt him.  
  
"William?" he asked using the name the boy would only tolerate in private. "Ma boy, what have I done? Who have I hurt? Who haven't I hurt? Even you ma boy. I allowed Drusilla to destroy a work of art: a beautiful poet."  
  
"Angelus, Sire, come off it man." Said Spike with a laugh thinking his sire was playing him for a fool. "A beautiful poet! A bloody awful poet more like. Angelus come off it! Let's go feed."  
  
At the mention of feeding Angelus started to vomit. And shake. "What have I done?" he asked with a sob. "I'm sorry ma boy, I've ruined you."  
  
"No Sire, you've made me better, you've made me a man. Don't say these things. If you do not with to feed, come to bed with me. The women will be gone all night. You've made me strong, you've made me all I am."  
  
"I've made a monster." Angelus said crumbling back into himself.  
  
Spike felt like he'd died just a little. "Sire, don't say these things! Tell me what can I do to please you? I just want you to be happy."  
  
"Leave me, William, I wish to be alone with my self loathing."  
  
"I have to leave? Leave YOU? What will I be without you?" said the childe dejectedly.  
  
"I can do nothing, for you William." Said his sire sadly.  
  
"I love you, Sire." Spike said as he backed away. "Don't make me go. Maybe your daughter's worn on me for I can smell the soul on you, if you're afraid I'll protect you. If you hate me. . . please, whatever I've done I'll fix. Whatever you want, I'll be vicious or tame. I'll obey or challenge. I'll never look at Dru again. I'll kill everyone on earth or no one at all. If you command it, I'll do anything. I'll be a puppet on your string or lord over you. I'll do anything. Just don't make me leave. Please." He sobbed.  
  
"William, I can't look at you right now, not for what you are or have done, but what I forced you to do. I disgust myself. I can never redeem myself to you." The man said as though it pained him too.  
  
"Redeem? I forgive you now. There need be no restitution. Leave with me now? Or come to bed with me and leave come the morn' when your sire has already disowned you. Now put this aside Don't force me to leave."  
  
"Darla will loath me as you should. She will loath me for I am broken. Yet you, who has so recently left the mortal coil should loath me for all I've done to you. Why don't you? You must still have human thoughts. How would you feel if your soul was given back to you? Honestly now."  
  
"Disgusted and broken by all the things I've done. . . I feel that way now though. I've done everything I've done to prove myself to Dru and you. and I've tried to make the best of it. . . but if I were reensouled I would want you there. . . I would hate you if you left me. Come away with me. We'll live outside of this world you and I for always."  
  
"You never enjoyed the kill?" he asked softly. "You would leave Drusilla for me? We could do that? We could leave?  
  
"I enjoyed hunting, certainly. But the kill was always disgusting and wicked to me. Like a butcher I suppose. I tried to. . . for you and Dru. . . but I never had the stomach. I wrote some poetry on it." He said softly as he stalked towards his Sire. "Come away with me? I'll fix all this?" he asked pleadingly. "Please don't make me leave you. You'd only be adding to your sins."  
  
Angel pulled the boy towards him, "Help me pack?" he asked softly. It was all Spike could do not to cry with happiness.  
  
This story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Please Please Review! 


	2. Sires

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Dedicated to- Olive.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
"You're doing what?" she asked with venom. "You can't leave me I made you!"  
  
"Drusilla Darling, while you made me, and I do adore you, he has more of a claim to me. He made you, you're his, you made me but as he made you I'm still his. If he wishes me to go, I go. I'm sorry, I love you, we'll have eternity together but he needs me right now." He said calmly trying to assuage her. "It'll most likely take a few years, but we have forever." He lied smoothly knowing then he would never be back with his Princess for he loved his Lord more. "Where he goes, I must follow if he wishes it."  
  
"He isn't your sire! He is some beast wearing your sire's face. If you go with him you are truly weak! I see it now you're surrounded with you inadequacies."  
  
"Don't you know how to win friends and influence people. . . that would be a good name for a book. . . I must go, Pet, whether you wish it or not." He said as he picked up his bag and kissed her forehead.  
  
"You disgust me, William, I don't know why I ever gave you life." She said as she clawed at his face.  
  
"Well thanks just the same." He said as he left her in their bedroom. He heard Darla yelling and breaking glass and heard Angelus whimpering in pain but ignored the sound, let the man deal with his own sire, there was nothing he could do. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
" I gave you life! And now you disgust me! You're broken by that filthy soul! I can't believe this! I so disgusted! I can't believe this after all I've done to cultivate you into what I wanted you become. . . I don't even know what to call you. . . I don't know what you are!" she said as she struck him again. By this point he was covered in so much of his own blood.  
  
"Sire, I cannot help it, there is nothing I can do! Just let me go if I displease you so. I don't know what to do!" he said  
  
"So you want to leave with that mutt? Fine! Just get out of my sight!" she screamed as she broke number 127 of his bones. "Don't come back until you're my Angelus!" ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Spike walked into the room three minutes after she left. There on the floor was his sire unable to move. He gently caressed the man's hair as he threw him and his luggage over his shoulder. "Told you we should have left before they go back but noooo you wanted to see your sire. It's gonna be a slow day in the sewers until you heal, Sire."  
  
Angel laughed before he passed out.  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ This story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. Review! 


	3. No Madame, I'm interested in your meat p...

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Don't leave me," he begged softly as Spike laid him done on the bed of a little hotel. They had reached it just before dawn and Spike had begrudgingly paid for the rooms.  
  
It was strange to Spike to hear his Sire ask for something. Generally he just demanded and if Spike did not obey he was punished. This new Angelus seemed almost soft. "I will never leave you, Sire. I wouldn't if I could." He said striping his sire and then himself as he climbed into the bed. "Now go to sleep, you'll wake healed and we'll figure out what's next." He felt weird telling his sire what they would do. He was the childe, never once had he told this man what would happen.  
  
He pulled Angelus close to him as the man began to weep. "What have I done, William? What is to come of me?"  
  
"You had no control over what you did, it was purely your demon. And whatever is to come, I'll be there with you. Now hush, sleep now." He held the larger man close and caressed his face, "'The moving finger writes and having writ moves on' the past is done and there is nothing to change that all we can do is hope for a better tomorrow." He watched over his God until he was sure the man was asleep, he kissed his lips chastely, and then passed out himself.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Spike woke at ten to five knowing his sire to be an early riser. He slip out of the close embrace and groped for clothes on the floor. He kissed his sire's hand and wrote a note leaving it on the pillow beside Angelus' head. *Sire, Gone to a butchers to get blood. Be back in five minutes. Don't leave the room 'til I come home. Love, William* He shut the door softly behind him. He had an amazing gift for language before he died he knew French and Latin. Since then he learnt Romanian, Italian, and Spanish.  
  
He saw the chamber maid walking toward him. She was a small Romanian girl no older than twelve. He asked her, in Romanian, not to disturb his companion. She laughed and replied that he had seemed very drunk when they came in that morning: what with Spike carrying him and all. They both laughed and he handed her twelve British pounds which was surely more money than she'd seen in her life. He winked at her and said thank you for understanding and try to keep everyone else out. She nodded mutely in amazement.  
  
Spike wandered down to a butcher's but couldn't remember the name for blood sausage and so made the gesture of someone eating a large sausage. The butcher's wife mistook the show as a proposition and told him to get the hell out of her establishment. After a few more gesture, one of which was a cow being slaughtered, he had two liters of bovine blood in four glass bottles.  
  
As he walked up the stairs he saw the chamber maid and nodded to her as way of greeting. She called for him to stop and told him that a "tall, blond, angular woman" had been looking for him and his friend. Spike started to panic. But the girl just laughed and said that she used discretion and told the woman that they had only had a drink in the tavern there early that morning. He kissed the girl full on the lips and gave her another ten pound note. She tried to give it back but he insisted she kept it saying she'd saved them both from a fate worse than death. He started dancing with her, thanked her and walked back to the room.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"What were you doing to the maid?" asked Angelus as Spike walked in. It was obvious that he had just woken up. Spike shook one of the bottles of blood and handed it to his sire.  
  
"She saved us." He said. "Darla came searching probably to kill you off and the girl told her we weren't here. I like her. And she laughed when she thought you were drunk. She's got class. How are you feeling?"  
  
"I feel physically fine." He said slowly staring at the bottle. "I can't drink this."  
  
"Focus on the physical, forget about emotional. Why can't you drink it? It's bovine."  
  
"I feel sick at the thought."  
  
"Angelus-" Spike started but was cut off.  
  
"Don't call me that name! She gave me that name! I did everything under that name." Said a nearly crying Angel.  
  
Mood swing boy, thought Spike but then said out loud, "What shall I call you? Sire, Liam?"  
  
"No, call me nothing for that is what I am." He sobbed.  
  
"Melodramatic much? You must have a name. Chose one for yourself if need be. . . what about Conner that's a nice Irish name."  
  
"That name is filled with foreboding." Said the sulking Angelus.  
  
"Then what about Angel? It's neither before you were a vamp nor after. . . it's during."  
  
"You don't think it sounds like a ponce's name?" he asked like a child worried by monsters asking for reassurance from their parents.  
  
"No, it's far too poofy to be a ponce's name." Spike said with a soft laugh. "Now drink."  
  
"I cannot." He said with resolution.  
  
"You will die, Sire." He said trying to reason.  
  
"Perhaps that would be best, ma boy." Came the self loathing reply.  
  
Spike was instantly angered at that. His sire had just said he'd rather be dead with no regard for Spike's feelings. And yes, Spike knew he was soft and that vampires weren't supposed to have feelings. And yes, he could have accepted it from Angelus but this new "Angel" wasn't supposed to want to hurt him. He yanked the bottle away from the larger man and swallowed the contents in one gulp. He felt the blood course through his veins. He bit hard into his wrist and thrust it into Angel's face. "Drink." He said. Angel shook his head. "Think of it not as feeding, think of it as your sire's right to take of your childe."  
  
"I don't want to hurt you for the sake of some right."  
  
"It won't hurt! This is a gift given willingly from me to you. Please, if that doesn't please you realize that I want you to feed from me, so really you'd only be hurting me by not doing it." Spike started to cry, "Please, Sire, for me please drink."  
  
Angel's tears were restarted by the sight of his childe's. He pulled the boy into his strong arms and placed feather kisses all over his face before devouring his wrist. 


	4. 143

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated. I slightly changed the first chapter to go with this one all that changed was Angel never said he loved Spike.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
For Anne, for relating  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Angel groaned in his sleep. Spike watched him with concern and put down the book he was reading and took off his half moon glasses. He snuggled down into the man's chest and whispered. "Sire, it's a dream. Come back to me." Angel's dead body was sweating, an amazing feet. "Great, You didn't drink enough and now you're sick. Soon you'll be like those famine children just not half so funny." Angel didn't stir. "Angel?" he asked with an edge of fear.  
  
Suddenly Angel vaulted upright and bit deeply into Spike's neck. He drank deep for two whole minutes. The blood was being pulled as if by a vacuum out of Spike's veins; he could feel them collapse in on themselves. Fumbled blindly on the bedside table he found one of the bottles and drank in time with Angel. As he finished he threw the bottle aside, heard it shatter, and grabbed a new one. He stroked the back of Angel's head as he drank. He could feel the man's tears pouring down his shoulder. The man's demon had won over the soul. Slowly Spike rocked him back and forth like a child as they both drank.  
  
He pulled back and was done as quickly as he had started. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I'm sorry." He said as he started to pull away from his childe.  
  
"There is nothing to be sorry for, Sire. You do what you need to survive, I don't care. I want you to be ok, that's the most important thing. I'm ok, I'm not hurt. I told you that you could before. Anyway you're my sire: it's your right."  
  
"It's not a right! I'm not your sire! I'm just the guy who made the girl who made you!" he said angrily and instantly regretted it upon see the hurt in Spike's eyes.  
  
"You are my sire! Whether you like it or not- you made me. And maybe that makes you sick, but you can't disown me." He said his words filled with low malice covering pain.  
  
"That's not what I meant, William-" he started but Spike interrupted him.  
  
"Don't call me that, only my SIRE calls me that. I'm Spike to you." He said near tears.  
  
Angel roughly dragged the boy to his chest, "William." Said he softly, "William," he repeated with menace instantly causing his childe to look up in fear expecting an Angelus-esqu punishment. "I didn't mean to disown you, all I meant is that you aren't just my childe. You're better than that, you're my equal. I love you." He ended slowly.  
  
"What?" asked Spike shocked by the revelation. His sire owned him, cared for him, lorded him, but never, "You love me?"  
  
"With all my heart." He said. "I love you. I always have. . . that's why I hated you so much, I've never loved anyone. And as a vampire. . . well it's too fucking human. I love you William." He finished as he plundered his Childe's mouth.  
  
The kiss was filled with gentle, innocent need and love. Spike held to the larger man with all his might afraid that he might awake at any moment to find himself alone in bed. "I promise you I will find some way to make you happy, to make you be able to go from day to day overwrote with guilt. I will make you feel the pain less."  
  
Angel pulled the boy closer still to him, "Just your being here makes it more bearable. Can this work? Where are we going to go?" he asked more rhetorically that literally.  
  
"Don't you usually field these questions?" he said with a sad smile. "But I do know that we need to make haste in leaving the country come sunset. We need to leave before Darla finds us. She'll kill you, you know she will. And I like my Angel dust free." He said cupping Angel's head.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
At sunset they rose, fed, and left the city as quickly as possible. They were on the next passenger boat out of the country and at sunrise they were sound asleep in a master suit about the St. Elizabeth. 


	5. Boxers and Slayers

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated This takes places long after the last scene in another we know rather well. BTW I'm working off the assumption that there was no happiness clause.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
For Dr. G for getting me out of hot water with Dad. "Tobias, she's suicidal, who cares if she fails Chem as long as she's not cutting herself." He has such a way with words. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Boxer Rebellion  
  
He stumbled into the room smelling of liquor, and blood, and tears. His false breathing hitched as he fell into sobbing. "Don't look at me." He muttered as he fell to the floor. "Please, just don't." Sobbed Spike. Angel reached for him and Spike recoiled. "Don't touch me!"  
  
"William, what happened?" asked his sire slowly. "Are you ok? Do I need to kill someone?" solicited Angel remembering the last time he'd seen his childe cry.  
  
"I, I, I didn't want to! I didn't speak enough Chinese to explain. I didn't want to."  
  
"I'm sure you didn't, pet. What happened?" beseeched Angel getting more worried by the minute.  
  
"I-I-I was fighting this vamp who was about to eat this little girl. And- and-and the slayer saw me vamped out and I tried to explain, but I couldn't articulate to her what I was doing and she started and and and it was me or her and and and I killed her! And as she died in my arms she asked me to tell her mother she was sorry! Well what the fuck did she have to apologize for? That she'd been called against her will or that she'd been killed at the hands of a beast? And I brought her body to her mother and and and the woman thanked me! She fucking thanked me for bring her baby corpse home!"  
  
"Hush hush now. Come lay next." Said Angel softly his childe obeyed. "It was self-defense. There was nothing you could do. You did what was best."  
  
"No touching, I'm dirty."  
  
"No you're not. You're beautiful." He said as he stroked the boys face. "Have you fed?" Spike shook his head. "You need to feed. You're always telling me this. And you're drunk. And you're covered in mud. We're gonna remedy this." He said as he picked up his childe, undressed him and put him in the hot bath he'd drawn only minutes before. He looked at his near comatose ward and knew he would not drink from the bottle no matter how he was cajoled. Angel gulped the bottle down and slid in to the bath behind Spike. He slowly washed blood and dirt and tears off his childe as he made soft hushing noises. Spike finally stopped crying and just relaxed under his sire's ministrations. He leaned back as Angel tugged on him. Spike rested his head on the larger man's shoulder. Angel exposed his neck and pulled Spike closer. Whispering sweet nothings he persuaded the boy to bite him. "I love you." He whispered as Spike drank. "I love you, William, don't ever leave me. I'd die without you. I need you strong and healthy by my side. I need you, hear?" he slowly washed his hair and cleaned the boy's wounds. "You're my beautiful childe, my mate, my life. I feel ill at the thought of losing you. No matter what you fight. I'm proud of you tonight. You did what you needed to do, what I needed you to do. I love you. You did nothing wrong, hear? Nothing wrong." Spike stopped drinking. And Angel just smiled at him. "Better?"  
  
"Hunger? Check. Clean? Check. Sober? Check. Wanting to be here for you? Check. Can we go to bed?" he asked softly. Angel nodded with a slow smile. "Why do I deserve you?" he asked of his sire.  
  
"I think the PTB lost track of us a long time ago." Said Angel quietly. "They figure that we haven't done anything wicked in a few years so why not give us free rein for a while. Anyway, we're the good guys now so we get what we want."  
  
"The good guys." Said Spike softly as he started to cry again.  
  
"William, look at me, boy. You did nothing wrong. I would have done the same, anyone would have."  
  
"I don't like letting you down. You think so much of me. I don't mind having killed her so much as the fact I enjoyed it. I loved it. And not just the fight not the exhilaration of fighting a worthy opponent, but the kill. I killed a slayer. I've never thought of a kill as something fun just survival or personal revenge. But I broke her neck it wasn't feeding. I loved it. I felt as though my skin were glowing like a fucking virgin feels the morning after. Yes, you would have done it, but you wouldn't have gotten off on it. I try so hard to be the man I have to be to be by your side. But tonight I failed I lost to myself, I've never lost before."  
  
"You didn't drink from her."  
  
"I knew you'd never had me if I did."  
  
"You could have lied to me."  
  
"You would have known by my face."  
  
"I don't believe you, Will."  
  
"Am I William? Am I your sweet dear boy or am I the monster who wears his face?"  
  
"The very fact that you're sorry for enjoying it shows you're my baby. The demon wouldn't give a damn, wouldn't be here with me now. He be out killing the innocent."  
  
"I love you." He said softly through the tears.  
  
"I love you too.. Now let's go to bed."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"So wait, let me get this right." Said the blond. "You're Angel and you are a vampire with a soul." She said sarcastically. "And you say we're on a Hellmouth which literally sucks the world into a hell dimension and you know this Master guy."  
  
"Sire's sire. I know it's hard to believe," said Angel to the slayer.  
  
"And you give a damn that he's going to start an apocalypse why? Because you have a soul? Ok let's just say I believe you. Who the hell is your friend?"  
  
"I'm Spike." Said Spike with a wicked smirk enjoying the scene. "You're really little for a slayer."  
  
"Wait, William the bloody master of parlor tricks with railroad spikes, slayer of two slayers, is your buddy. And, Spike, you want to save the world why?"  
  
"Tobacco, dog racing, Man U? Any number of reasons really one being that I like not being on fire in a hell dimension. I need a drink anyone want anything?"  
  
"Rum and Coke. Buffy?"  
  
"Um, a café au lait?"  
  
"Coming up."  
  
"Does he always go from angry to thirsty?" asked the slayer confused.  
  
"No, keep your eye out for something shiny, he's just gone to investigate, he's like small children and birds in that respect." He scanned the bar. "There it is." He said pointing to a girl wear a silver top.  
  
"You're joking." Said the slayer as she checked the girl out. "She's not pretty."  
  
"No, no, no, trust me, it's nothing to do with her: it's her shirt. If you want to distract Spike for any period of time give a piece of tin foil."  
  
"The Slayer of Slayers?"  
  
"Look don't bring that up again. It's a touchy subject. One didn't speak English and thought he was evil and the other just plain wouldn't believe him, Nicky Woods was nothing if not obtuse and she wouldn't give up, she kept coming back and one time it was either die or kill. It was self- defense you would have done the same in his shoes."  
  
"Maybe he should have died." Said Buffy coldly.  
  
"You so much as look at him in a funny way and I won't kill you but I'll make you wish you were never born. We're here to help you of our own freewill and if you touch my childe you will die. Don't fuck over your allies. We're the good guys not the badies."  
  
"Why are you the good guys? A souled vamp and his pet?"  
  
"I'm in it for redemption. Spike's in it because he can, he's not like us he's enjoyed exactly two kills. I'm sure it doesn't take a genius to figure out which two. But he never sought out either. He is just as pure as he was the day he died. I mean, he turned his fucking mother for chrissakes cause he loved her. He's a vamp so he's evil. . . kinda but more in the "acts as if he's gonna whisper and then screams in your ear" type evil. He enjoys a good bit of torture as he basically views it as a game. He loves pissing people off and always enjoys a good brawl but he's more a yob than an evil being. He will always be that innocent boy he was the night he died. If you touch him, look at him, or in anyway threaten him, I kill you."  
  
"Wow, fatherly much?" asked Buffy as Spike came back with the drinks.  
  
He kissed Angel on the cheek and said, "One of these days I'm weaning you off of girly drinks." He said handing him the plastic Cisco cup.  
  
It suddenly clicked for Buffy. "Oh. Ok so, what do we know about this Master guy?"  
  
"Me kicked me once and told me I was a disgrace to the race as I bought Dru a doll instead of a child." Said Spike helpfully. "He's a messy eater, He's big on prophecies. He likes his big showy rituals (much like fluffy here when un-house broken). And oh yeah, he's going to kill us all." Said Spike sarcastically.  
  
"William." Warned Angel. "Why don't you meet me in an hour." He said with an edge to his voice. Spike gave him a pouty look but exited the Bronze quietly. "He has a tendency to dislike blonds, he has a history. . . He doesn't really like anyone to be honest, he has a history. But he's right. The next big thing coming up is the Harvest, kill the vessel of the Master and he's screwed. Then there's gonna be an anointed one, uber sort of vamp. Don't worry about that for a while focus on the Harvest."  
  
"That's your font of wisdom?" she asked.  
  
"God helps those who help themselves. Now if you'll excuse me I have a brassed off childe to find." He said and swooped out of the club.  
  
"What a hottie." Lamented Buffy as she walked back to her friends.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ "William!" called Angel softly like a predator mocking the hunted. "Oh, William, come out come out wherever you are!" he called as he walked down an alley. "Why are you hiding? I know you're here."  
  
"Don't treat me like a child, Angelus," said a voice from the shadows. "Don't speak to me like a child. I haven't been a fledgling in some 118 years so don't treat me like one! You just ordered me out like some minion not yet worthy of your presence. If you want me to leave I will but don't tell me like that. I'm leaving." His eyes were red from crying he held a fag in each hand but could smoke neither as he was shaking.  
  
"William, you were scaring the girl." He said softly he said reaching for the boy whom flinched.  
  
"I was just telling her the truth. I don't get why you want to work with her in the first place. We could save the world without her. But you see this as good training to leave her in good stand when we aren't here to fight her battles."  
  
"Isn't that a good thing?" he asked confused.  
  
"I saw the way you looked at her. Don't pretend it wasn't there."  
  
Angel just sighed. "I love you, William. I don't want some 12 year old little girl. I want you I'm with you. You were scaring her. I sent you out because you were scaring her. Maybe I shouldn't have ordered you out, you're right. But I certainly didn't do it so that I could get leg up in some fucking kids' club." He said as he backed Spike up against the wall. "Don't be stupid. Don't leave because I may have giving some chit the eye. You're my mate, I love you." He took one of the cigarettes off his lover as Spike bit him. "I love." Whispered Angel.  
  
Buffy watched in a shadow. Some 12 year old little girl? She'd see about that.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Should I go on? I don't know. Review. 


	6. The Skank

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated This takes places long after the last scene in another we know rather well. BTW I'm working off the assumption that there was no happiness clause.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
Sorry this took so long, things have been hectic, I got banned from ff.net for a spell, I needed to do a ten page paper on Jackson Pollock, my best friend betrayed me, my bf's parents decided he would do better at a Vermont boarding school, my girlfriends are bitches, and then a good friend of mine died. So all in all things have been chaotic and I've stopped crying about an hour ago.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Buffy looked at the outfit in the mirror. She hated the style but she knew she looked damn good. Walking slowly down the stairs she tried to be as quiet as she could, fearing what her mother would make of the outfit. The door was three feet away when she heard the voice.  
  
"Buffy what are you wearing?" asked Joyce Summers. Turning slowly Buffy was confronted by the sight of her mother examining her. Looking down at the truly short leather skirt and shredded black tee-shirt she figured the truth was best. Well, the edited truth. She thought for a moment and just as she was about to speak, Joyce beat her to it. "I'll start for you: There's a boy."  
  
"And he's really cute, and he would never go for peppy little Buffy." Said Buffy.  
  
Joyce smiled her most condescending smile. "One day, honey, you're gonna realize that you like boys who like you for you."  
  
"You're so right, Mom, one day! Can I go?" she asked desperate to get to the bronze.  
  
"What's his name?" asked Joyce crossing her arms and interrogating as she thought Buffy was hiding something, which she was.  
  
"Angel."  
  
"How did you meet him?"  
  
"At the Bronze."  
  
"How old is he?"  
  
"A little older than me."  
  
"How little?"  
  
"He's a freshman at SU." Lied Buffy thinking her mother would berate her for this and then she could leave.  
  
"Buffy, Don't you think that's a little old? I don't really like this." Said Joyce taking the lie hook, line, and sinker.  
  
"Yes, but I'll be careful. You trust me right? And Willow will be there. You trust her right?"  
  
Joyce sighed heavily, "Go on then. Home by twelve."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"How did you get out of the house like that?" asked Xander as he laid eyes on her.  
  
"I slayed my mother." Said Buffy dryly. "Have either of you seen Angel? I want to talk to him."  
  
"And mother his undead spawn?" Asked Xander.  
  
"Eventually."  
  
"Buffy, I want to be supportive friend and all. But isn't he kinda with that Spike guy?"  
  
"So?"  
  
"So not only are you trying to get him to leave his significant other, you're trying to change his sexuality." Explained X.  
  
Willow shot Xander a look for his bluntness but nodded at the message. "I mean, he's a vampire and don't they do that whole mate thing? Like he's bonded to that Spike guy? Those bonds are really hard to break."  
  
"He could do it if he wants to." Said Buffy stiffly.  
  
"What's the likelihood that he wants to?" asked Xander.  
  
"Wow, I'm so glad I have such supportive friends." Said Buffy sarcastically as she got up upon seeing Angel and unfortunately, Spike enter. She bounded up to them and at the last minute remembered that she was NOT desperate. And said, "Oh! Angel, hi, I didn't expect to see you here."  
  
Spike growled slightly under his nonexistent breath but upon seeing Angel roll his eyes ever so slightly he just smirked at the girl in his predatory manner. "Buffy, it's wonderful to see you, dear," he said in a patronizing tone. Angel gave his hand a slight reassuring squeeze asking Spike to back off a little. Suddenly he was bored like the cat that is declawed and muzzled two minutes after being put in the pet mouse's cage. He sighed, saw a guy with a lot of shiny piercings, and wandered away.  
  
Angel watched his childe with a smile and then turned to Buffy feeling slightly annoyed that she was still there. "What is it, Buffy?" he asked coldly he noticed her outfit and added. "What the hell happened to that shirt? Or is it a rag you tied on?"  
  
"The Harvest?" asked Buffy ignoring the statement but blushing despite herself, "I've read everything on it. But none of it says when it is more than some St.'s day."  
  
"It's happening this Saturday." He said uninterested. "Was that all?" he inquired.  
  
"Well, all the shoptalk yeah." Said Buffy trying to ignore his attitude. "Would you like to dance with me?" she asked.  
  
Angel looked at her in an appraising manner and after a moment said, "No." He scanned the bar for Spike and said. "I'm gonna go find my BOYFRIEND. I'll see you later, Buffy." He turned away without a second look at her.  
  
Buffy thought it was actually a good thing that he wasn't watching her as she was burning scarlet. Willow saw her and gave her a empathetic look. "Do you want a coffee?" she asked as Buffy sat down.  
  
"Can we just leave?" she asked with tears in her eyes. 


	7. the friendship

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated This takes places long after the last scene in another we know rather well. BTW I'm working off the assumption that there was no happiness clause.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"I'm sorry." Said Spike as Buffy opened her front door still dressed in her kit from the Bronze.  
  
"Why?" She asked coldly.  
  
"I'm sorry Angel was cold with you."  
  
"That's hardly your fault." She said in a bored tone as though she hadn't been hurt by the situation.  
  
"Actually, it is entirely my fault. I'm a paranoid person. And I felt extremely threatened by you. Angel is a very conscientious person when it comes to protecting the people he loves, I think it's his way of making up for all the harm he's done in the past. He is completely out of touch with the human race, he didn't really mean to hurt you, he was merely being thorough in alleviating my fears. He wasn't being cruel, just callous. And I feel awful that this couldn't have worked out another way. I think we all got started on the wrong foot and I want to ratify that. Because I judged you before I knew anything about you. And while I'm sure we'll hate each other once we know each other isn't that better than hating you solely because I do? And maybe that sounds weird, but you have to know: I don't like blonds or people in general, I have a history." He said in one unneeded breath.  
  
"Angel said something to that effect. And yes I am willing to forgive you until I find an actual reason to hate you." Said Buffy with a smile. "Wanta Coke?"  
  
"You forgive awfully easily. There is something unnervingly Christ like about that." Said Spike with a patented smirk.  
  
"Yep, Coke?" asked Buffy again with a bob of her body.  
  
"Sure, pet, that would be nice." He tried to enter the house but was repelled by the invisible barrier, "you need to invite me in, love."  
  
"Really? I thought that was only in old, bad movies? You are welcome into my house, William." She said with the soft laugh of an amused teenage girl.  
  
Spike felt sick as something twanged within him. Human, she's human, he muttered inside his head, you can't like her. She isn't pleasant, she's a meal, a mortal, pathetic meal, he thought as a mantra. Yet for all his inner protests he smiled back at her, she was a spunky little thing.  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"No, I won't accept that. Hans and Luke are so not a couple!" screamed Buffy.  
  
"Denial much, Grasshopper? You think Luke spends all his time mopping over his sister? Please, Hans is there being all wise and older and cool. Say hello to the sexual tension cum relationship." Said Spike like a guru teaching his young disciple.  
  
"Blasphemy!" Buffy said with a laugh as she turned back to the movie they had been watching for the last hour.  
  
Joyce walked into the house, "Buffy? I'm home. How was the Bronze?" She walked into the living room and was met with the scene. "Oh! You must be Angel!" said Joyce looking at the smiling, nice looking young man on the couch with her daughter.  
  
"No, I'm William, Angel's boyfriend. It's great to see you, Mrs. Summers, I love you're gallery. We actually met very briefly at the opening of the sun exhibition a few weeks back. We discussed the work of that girl." He snapped his fingers repeatedly trying to remember the artist's name.  
  
"Ella Cain! I remember now. You purchased that statue of the girl pray at the alter of the sun." Said Joyce getting excited and playing into Spike's hands as she instantly forgot about Angel's sexual orientation.  
  
"That's my sculpture!" he said glad she remembered him.  
  
"Would you like some coffee? Or coco, I make famous coco. Can I tempt you, William. And, honestly ,call me Joyce." Offered Joyce.  
  
"I would murder for good coco." Said Spike in an agreeable manner. Buffy snickered at the turn of phrase. 


	8. blondes

Summery: what if Spike and not Darla had found Angel the night he was ensouled?  
  
Disclaimer: this is m/m slash if you find that offensive do not read all flames on this matter will be ignored.  
  
Author's notes- this story is not yet completed and changed direction within the first two pages into being written. Any advice would be greatly appreciated This takes places long after the last scene in another we know rather well. BTW I'm working off the assumption that there was no happiness clause.  
  
Other notes- sorry this chapter was so long in coming, I have an excuse but it's not that valid, Finals means nothing.  
  
Rated R for swearing and adult content.  
  
Part- 8/?  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
"Where have you been? I've been worried about you!" demanded Angel as his childe walked in to the mansion they had just bought.  
  
"I went over and apologized to the Slayer on your behalf, I've been on damage control for the last three hours. I'm the mean one, you're supposed to be nice and soulful but as it was, you were mean." He said coldly acting on Buffy's behalf. "Oh and hey, thanks for telling her about my history with blonds, that's sweet of you to just pour my life out for her."  
  
"Wait. . . A) I simply said you had a history and therefore hated blonds. And B) I thought I was supposed to get her to not like me. I thought you felt threatened didn't you tell me not to dance with her before we went in?"  
  
"You could have let her down easily. All it would have taken was puppy dog eyes, lets be friends, puppy dog eyes and the situation would have been over. I thought you were thought to be the one it touch with humanity?" said Spike.  
  
Then his Sire pulled him towards himself by the hips. "I was worried," he said again. "I didn't know where you were. And I thought we were long past cat-and-mouse games. Hum?" he asked tilting Spike's chin back.  
  
"Sorry, I didn't mean to cause you to fret." He said and chastely kissed his Sire on the mouth. "She's a nice little kid." He said.  
  
"Who?" asked Angel. "Oh the Slayer? Is she? How pleasant for her. Don't get attached, heart, they're like goldfish, they have a life expectancy of five minutes."  
  
"I never met a nice Slayer. I always thought they were not that human, more like a killing machine. But she has a mom, and friends, and narrow opinions on Luke Skywalker's sexuality. And more than anything, she has a distinct innocence about her. She goes out and risks her life every night to save the world that's strength, but when she's scorned by a boy she goes home and cries. It makes me feel slightly ill."  
  
"Oh, Will," said Angel and pulled the vaguely red eyed boy to him. "I know, shhh, I know. It's not fair and life sucks," he smirked and went on, "and a millennia ago some old men decided that a poor little girl would have to face all this by herself and it never got changed. That sucks too. But there is nothing you or I can do about except try to make sure that this little girl isn't all by herself."  
  
"What about the prophecy? Should we tell her she's going to die?" asked Spike angry at the world.  
  
"No, all we can do is try to make the prophecy wrong. Hello, we're William the Bloody and Angelus respectively, if we can prove all the prophecies wrong why can't we help Buffy conquer hers? We're not just going to watch her die, I promise you and do I ever not come through?" he asked softly with a smile.  
  
"No, you never fail, I guess I'm just freaking out."  
  
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
Flashback  
  
They had been running for a month and a bit when Darla spotted them in Thailand. This was where Spike's world fell apart and caused him to hate blonds for the rest of his unlife. The crazy blond bitch had it in for them. Angry at Angel for getting a soul and angrier still at Spike for consorting with the anomaly she was out to destroy them. All over the world they had fled her yet they could not get away. It was getting worse, she almost seemed to be a step ahead of them and Spike was starting to wonder if she didn't view this as a game of sorts. The faster then ran the closer she seemed to get. Penn, the beloved blond son came home to his grandsire to join the fun. The second of Angelus' children had always been favored by the man. The two had spent days torturing Spike simply because they were bored and he was weaker than they. As Angel, he clung to Spike which left Penn alone and livid. Drusilla held their speed back slightly, and so she killed Drusilla.  
  
Spike had neither ate nor slept since the incident. He was skin and bones. After watching that stone cold blond bitch kill his Sire, as a lesson to him about running away, he was a mere slip of a boy. Speech seemed to be a lost art to William, he sat silent for most of the day answering questions in yes and no answers. He had fed once after Angel beaten him to the point where if he had gone any longer Spike would have been dead, only then did he submit to being fed all other times he simply shied away when Angel came near him. He cried all night while the other man slept for he would not weep in front of the other man. And he moved like an animated corpse, which he was but never had it been evident before.  
  
He could feel the absence of her within himself. Vampires are telepathist and her being gone meant loosing a part of his own mind. Therefore he lost all his slight touches of second sight. He could no longer hear the stars, and even though he had always ignored them, he suddenly missed their mindless prattling. Never before had he felt so alone in his own head.  
  
Sometimes he could feel Angel within his mind but he instantly blocked the man out. Deep down he knew the man was trying to comfort him but he still resented him for Drusilla's death. He knew it was irrational but he blamed Angel for her death. Angel was feeling the pain too for his childe had died, yet he seemed to get by, which made Spike even more angry.  
  
Finally one day Angel had lost his patients and tried to fix Spike the only way how: he beat the unliving daylights out of him. Spike had fought back yet was weak from not feeding for so long. Eventually he passed out from Angels barrage. As soon as the boy was out Angel feed him while still unconscious and cleaned and dressed his wounds. Upon waking Spike had clung to him and wept like a child. Held for hours, by the one person who still loved him, made him feel better, cleaner. And then night when they boarded a boat headed to Amsterdam Spike was whistling and holding his Sire's hand. 


End file.
